35 Things I’ve Learned by 35

I’m turning 35 soon, and it’s got me reflecting on just how much life has taught me so far; so I decided to do something I haven’t done in years: write a listicle.

I hope I get to keep learning for a very long time, both because learning is fun and because I’m certain I could easily come up with 35 things I haven’t learned by 35. Presently, though, I’m thankful for — and proud of — how far I’ve come and how much I’ve learned in my 35 years.

I hope you'll enjoy learning about a few of the things I’ve learned about in my life so far, and I hope you’ll comment on this post with something you’ve learned recently (or not so recently).

I’ve been called an intensely curious person, and it’s a description I both adore and agree with. I love to learn, and I love to inform. Let’s teach other.

Here’s 35 things I’ve learned by 35:

1. I actually LOVE science.

   Some of my favorite science content:

2. I actually don’t love social media (but I do love Substack and YouTube).

3. Some people don’t change.

4. Some people do change.

5. Some people may never take you seriously.

6. Love isn’t all you need.

7. Not all abuse is physical.

8. Not all physical abuse leaves bruises.

9. You can absolutely be sexually assaulted by an intimate partner.

10. Loyalty given doesn’t guarantee loyalty returned.

11. It’s OK to have loved someone who didn’t deserve it.

12. It’s OK to still have love for someone who doesn’t deserve it.

13. Nostalgia can feel like grief.

14. Grief can be lifelong.

15. Grief exists on a spectrum.

16. Healing is lifelong.

17. It’s OK to need medication.

18. It’s OK to need people.

19. It’s OK to ask for help.

20. It’s OK to age out of things (like getting high).

21. It’s OK to be single.

22. It’s OK to be happily child-free.

23. It’s OK if you don’t want to monetize your passion.

24. It’s OK if you do want to monetize your passion.

25. It’s OK to be vegetarian.

26. It’s OK to be queer.

27. You don't really know what you would do in a situation until you’re in it.

28. A potential employer needs to impress you as much as you need to impress them.

29. Aging is a privilege.

30. I have OCD, and that’s OK.

31. I don’t actually enjoy drinking IPAs.

32. Coworkers can feel like family, but your employer isn’t your family; and if it claims to be, that’s a red flag.

33. Religious trauma is real and valid.

34. Stress can be dangerous.

35. My parents did some things right. 😉